What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Why do people say African Americans act the way they do because they're poor, when the ones with money act the same?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

How does Bollywood influence Indian culture?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

What is the story behind bhai dooj?

TEXT:

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

How common is it for siblings to fight over their parents' inheritance money? What is the best way to handle this type of situation?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

How did you become popular in school?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

When do you feel most peaceful ever?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Have you ever been humiliated in front of a group of girls and enjoyed it?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Why do Democrats keep calling Patriots/President Trump supporters "sore losers"? Do they purposefully ignore the massive fraud that took place, or genuinely think that there was zero fraud?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Will you share your wife? Can she take both of us at the same time?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

How strict are your parents?

Make Nazis afraid again!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Why hasn't Japan legalized same-sex marriage?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.